Since being in grad school, on top of working full time — the thought of having free time is laughable. Most of my days are spent wishing I could have fun experiences, but when I do have a moment of freedom, I never end up doing anything.

“I’m too tired.”
“I don’t feel like doing much today.”
“It’s too far of a drive for my liking”. (I live in flyover country).

And just like clockwork, I spend it at home zoning out into a wall, getting consumed by my own mental exhaustion and depression.

As I’m writing this, it is my 33rd birthday. My dad has been gone for over a year now. With death ever-present, it’s made me reflect: even though I'm exhausted, I’d rather be exhausted and fulfilled rather than exhausted and missing out on the world around me. It’s not an easy feat. Albeit, I’ve made up my mind and I have no choice.

You see, my dad waited for his retirement to enjoy life. His year of retirement was spent dying of cancer. It haunts me.

I’ve made an oath that year 33 will begin the year I start saying yes to myself (within reason because rest is still important).

Arwyn did not care for taking a selfie. She’s such a good sport.

A Five Hour Drive to Paradise

I had a friend go to the Indiana Dunes recently. She inspired me to make a trip myself since she was so in awe of its beauty.

My big impulsive plan was to book a hotel for the night for my family and I (in addition to three animals). With hotels being $200+ a pop per night, that was an immediate no (cries in student loan debt and car loans). I figured, camping was cheap…but the spots were booked. My final option was to make the ten hour drive (round trip) even though our time there would only be a fraction of the drive. I almost opted out, but said screw it.

And y’know what? I’m glad.

The drive wasn’t special. It consisted of the usual sights you see driving through flyover country. Cows, cemeteries, and the occasional religious billboard. Luckily, boring can easily be remedied with the right Spotify playlist.

The eight of us split up into two vehicles: my mom, my cat (Arwyn), and I in one; Shawn, the step-kiddos, and the two dogs (XiaoHuang and Luna) in the other. Despite feeling overwhelmed like the mother in Home Alone, no one was left behind, and the drive turned out to be smoother than expected—though we were all drained and stiff from the drive by the end of it all.

Kemil Beach…or not

If I don’t do pre-travel research, I worry incessantly about all the worst-case scenarios. As a result, I discovered that West Beach wasn’t pet-friendly—a disappointment for my four-legged children. Our alternative was Kemil Beach. However, I hadn’t accounted for the size of the parking lot; when we arrived, Kemil’s lot and the road leading to it were bumper to bumper. Of course, it was a Sunday during the summer in Indiana. With no open spots and no plan b, I decided to play it by ear and hoped there was another beach within the National Park that would allow pets.

Luna’s first time at the beach. As you can see, she’s a water dog.

Onward to the Dunes

The traffic getting into Indiana Dunes National Park made the Kemil Beach parking lot situation look like a typical 5 o'clock rush hour. It was P A C K E D. The progress was slow, cars moving only an inch every five minutes. Although, that’s the price one has to pay for an impromptu, improperly researched trip. We were so close. However, within 20 minutes, we reached the entrance. It cost $7 for local vehicles and $12 for out-of-state ones—a deal, if you ask me!

The beach parking was full, but thank God there was overflow parking. I don’t think any of us could’ve dealt with another malfunction. We started walking towards the beach and realized the overflow parking wasn’t even a 5 minute walk away from the beach. It was a birthday miracle.

As we got closer, signs in bright red letters stated “No pets allowed”. They were posted all across the beach, something we had already anticipated. My main focus shifted to the kids, who were still in good spirits. They had been so patient during the car ride, all I wanted to do was get them in the safe parts of the water.

The three of us adults decided to take turns watching the boys. One adult would stay with the kids whilst the other two wrangled the animals and took them on a walk. I know what you’re thinking, and yes, I agree. It was indeed chaotic and impractical.

Despite the temperature being only 75 degrees, all the animals were panting heavily. The sand was toasty from the heat absorption, and my panic began to set in. Would we have to call it quits and leave? Thankfully, my husband managed to find a park ranger who informed him and my mother that if we continued walking to the right of West Beach, we would find a section that welcomed dogs.

I was relieved that the positives of the trip were emerging and we wouldn’t have to make an immediate five-hour drive back home.

Don’t go in too Deep

Even though the freshwater seas of Lake Michigan looked tranquil and inviting, the waters are known to be unpredictable. According to an article written by ABC57, it is the deadliest lake of the five Great Lakes. As I stood in the warm lake, hearing the gentle sounds of the lake softly meeting the sands, my dark curiosities wondered how many people had drowned in this lake. At the same time, it was difficult not to admire the beauty of Lake Michigan’s crystal clear water or its impeccably flat skipping rocks (these are treasures to me).

Park rangers sped by on 4 wheelers, equipped with megaphones warning beach goers to keep out of swimming depths due to unpredictable currents and tides. Those swimming moved to shallow, waist deep waters. Once the rangers were out of sight, the ignorantly confident went back to swim.

A kind Russian woman greeted us as she walked past with her rotund meatball of a yellow lab. The mellow canine was just as polite and pleasant as her owner was. My dogs whined with desperation, wanting to make a new friend and she graciously allowed my dogs to meet hers. XiaoHuang and Luna happily wagged their tails as they sniffed her dog’s posterior. Arwyn judged everyone, scanning the area for potential dangers from the safety of her backpack. She deemed the surrounding area safe and joined the rest of us, content with sitting on my mom’s lap as she watched the waves merge into an embrace with the shore. Eventually, Arwyn deemed Lucy the Yellow Lab worthy of her presence and came out to greet her. There truly couldn’t have been a more precious movie-esque moment.

Eventually, Shawn took Luna back into the water. She leaped and hopped all around, swimming about as Shawn held onto her leash. I joked that we wouldn’t see Luna again, and she would likely turn into a fresh water dolphin if we let her free. He waded around the thigh deep waters, keeping a watchful eye on both boys and the enthusiastic Luna. We recently found a creek back home that he’s been enjoying skipping rocks on, so the over abundance of flat stones elated him. I felt like a kid again, finding as many flat stones as possible, happily handing them to Shawn as he filled his pockets. With a perfect flick of his wrist, the stones skipped a far distance turning into endless ripples in the water. A man nearby was equally as fascinated by Shawn’s rock skipping abilities, attempting to skip one himself.

T-Minus 1 Hour

The boys happily splashed about in the water, practicing holding their breaths so they could one day be good swimmers. They looked outwards at the swimming beach goers and marveled out how they could easily float on their backs, something they’ve been trying to learn at the pool back home. Luna was exhausted from doggy paddling in the water and XiaoHuang happily napped in the giant hole she dug in the sand. My mom was getting visibly exhausted, as was Arwyn. Knowing we had a long drive ahead of us, I prepared the boys and let them know we had to leave soon, otherwise the grown ups would be too tired to safely drive. Despite attempted protests, their tired eyes told a different story. To their credit, they understood. My mom bought them vanilla soft serve ice cream at the pavilion. That seemed to fix any lingering disappointment. With quick bathroom breaks and changes into clean pajamas, we were off.

XiaoHuang awkwardly posing with her sister and Shawn

on the road again

According to Shawn, it didn’t take long for the boys to fall asleep. XiaoHuang rode with Arwyn, my mom, and I on the way home. For some reason XiaoHuang gets less carsick in sedans. She had quite the slobbery time on the ride up and we wanted her to be less miserable this time around. Arwyn acted as my co-pilot whilst my mom and XiaoHaung peacefully dozed off in the car. The drive didn’t feel long and surprisingly I wasn’t as tired as I thought I would be. All I could think about was how my dad would’ve loved Lake Michigan. Staring out at the sunset, I looked at how beautiful the day was and knew in that moment I had made the right decision.

Until the next adventure,

Keisha Hsiao

A last minute decision: Three Hours At Lake Michigan